Hey Reader!

“They don’t learn to regulate by being told to “calm down.” They learn by being calmed with.” - source​

Stop for a moment. Have you ever thought about the fact that no one is born knowing how to “calm down”? We all learn how to “calm down” in our early years by the interactions and relationships we have from the very beginning! How can you help a child learn how to calm down in your classroom? We loved these 5 tips from THIS article:

1. Stay close: Your physical presence is grounding. Sit beside an upset child or hold them if they let you.
2. Use a calm tone: A soothing voice helps settle an activated nervous system. Keep your voice low, slow, and steady.
3. Breathe slowly together: Your breath actually helps pace theirs. We naturally match the people closest to us in breathing rhythm.
4. Label feelings out loud: “That scared you. I’m here.” “You got sad when Mommy said goodbye this morning. I’m here with you.”
5. Comfort before correction: Help a child regulate first! No skills are taught when a child is upset/activated.

Remember that young children are learning every moment! They are watching/noticing how you handle various upsets and how you interact with others who are upset. As adults, we sometimes still need practice in self-regulation – bringing our elevated emotions back into a steady state - and we’ve had years of practice.

Will you commit to being a CO-regulation partner with young children? Sit with them, breathe with them, speak kindness and love over them even when they’re flailing about? And then…when their little hearts and minds and bodies are calm….THEN we can remind the about what’s an appropriate response to their upset.

What’s your favorite way to help young children calm down? Let us know by replying to this email!

Cheering you on this week!

-Your ECCN team

P.S. The article we link above and HERE also includes really practical strategies and game ideas to help young children build these skills in fun ways throughout the day! Who knew Red Light, Green Light helps teach self-regulation??

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